Cushion Nightmares with Chef Gordon Satan

I realize now that the pursuit of comfortable sitting is a demonic lie straight from the pits of Hell.

Ways I’ve tried to sit comfortably in the last 10 minutes across 2 chairs:

(4-leg folding chair with thin cushion)

1- “normally” (out of the question)

2- both my legs on my desk top, and my arms are underneath them to type.

3- legs still both on top of my desk, and arms over them, elbows resting on my thighs.

4- squatting like L from Death note.

5- an improper Slav-squat on the balls of my feet.

(“GAMER” chair)

1- “normally” (out of the question)

2- propped up with a pillow like a terminally-ill hospital patient because the seat is too deep. There’s no way that this chair was designed for a human being.  The edge of the seat has extra-padding so it raises your  legs. I don’t know who thought it was a good idea, but they must have had suspiciously-long legs. Probably ending in hooves.

This was going to be a much longer post, but I really have no-one to blame but myself for not being able to figure out the secret to sitting comfortably at my desk. Who else am I going to blame, God? God didn’t make me buy a crappy gamer chair, and I don’t think He’s preventing me from adjusting my monitor height and distance. I’ll figure it out. Or maybe I never will and I’ll be uncomfortable until the day I die.

I’m going to go lie down on my tatami mat now to recover the stamina I’ve lost just from writing a stupid blog post.

New everything coming “SOON”.


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