|
I wrote this in LibreOffice and it was miserable. The Citadel is CHRISTPILLED?!
I will now talk at you about one(two) of the best FPS I’ve ever played. I started this review as a joke to cope with a game that I was enjoying seemingly preaching immorality, but that ended up not being the case at all, and I’m NOT just saying that because I suffer from the sin of Lust. My REVIEW can be summed up like this: the first game is a phenomenal experience that goes above and beyond most other shooters, and the sequel is “bigger and better” with its content and features. The shooting is tight, environmental traversal, your control of your character, it’s all just tight. While the story is seemingly a rejection of traditional Christian morality, it is only at face value. The midwit will walk away from this game saying “Whoa… take that, religion…” while you and I will play this and see “Ah yes, this is the Ultima 4 of anime girl shooters” Easily misunderstood, but also not that difficult to understand. For a quick example of what my CASE is, if I say “Gluttony is a sin” and you say “No it’s not, starving people deserve to eat” we’re simply not talking about the same thing. And that’s what Citadel does; it calls all self-worth Pride, it calls all comfort Sloth and it’s partially why I’m going to assert that’s ackshually a Christian game opposing uh… Gnosticism in Christian dress. Now obviously it’s a little silly to accuse some guy in Japan of being Christian against his will. But I’m doing it anywaylmao these are the consequences of using Christian language and imagery and purposefully or not creating something that I find in line with Christianity. Lemme first grab aaaall the thoughts I’ve written down previously in blog posts because I hate doing the same job twice for no reason, and because they’re all correct thoughts anyway. They’re not well organized, but they’re still muh thoughts at the time. I’ll meet you at The End. 1... I played The Citadel. It's a very impressive booma shoota. Anime waifu Doom in– I don't want to call it "Cyberpunk", it's something different and I like it more, it's a kind of mysterious gloomy desolate sci-fi brutalist architecture. Brutalism is very interesting because half the time I think it's awesome and the other half I hate it because soy "architects" love it because "it's efficient" and when they talk like that I think they should go to prison and stay there forever. There's something abou– I do not like anime gore, okay? I don't like it. I don't like cute things being destroyed. But I can handle The Citadel. I actually really like it, and maybe it's uh… helping "relax" my anime-gore squeamishness; NOT that that's something that I'd even want to become… desensitized to… I never want to be uh… the kind of person who delights in gore lmao. Like I've always enjoyed that you can blow someone's limbs off in F.E.A.R., but I've never enjoyed the *gore itself*. Anyway, lemme just get back to the game… I kinda love that you can do a tacticool reload and you lose any ammo in the mag. What else do I love? You can LEEEEEAN!!! LEEEEEEAAAAAANNN!!! 2… I beat The Citadel today. I liked it a lot. You are The Martyr, a "Battle Sister", and have to "free"(kill) seven angels representing the deadly sins and ultimately stop a "mad sleeping god" from waking up–or being born, who was uh… idk, corrupting all of them with its dreams or something. It's *just* the right amount of story. 7 chapters, maybe after each one new conversation with Tycho the merchant(who apparently is a boy, whatever it's anime)or one other character. There's more to it, but also probably a less than the fan speculation. I've developed some kind of extreme annoyance when people theorize to try to "pin down" lore, and make everything exact and unambiguous. The Zelda Timeline was a mistake. Also, I actually appreciate that a lot of people would not tolerate the game because of the gore. Even though *I* can cope with it, I'm glad to see that other people *don't* want to see the decapitated heads of anime girls with tears streaming down their faces. I don't think it was lmao I'm really about to say "I don't think it was gratuitous", but compared to the nightmarish sadism that freaks fap to, it's really not. It's about as gorey as a shotgun blast *should* be. That said, this is not the start of me enjoying seeing anime girls blown up. And also the sequel is a lot more explicitly sexual. The sequel's story is immediately worse to me for a number of reasons. You're supposed to "stop the Apocalypse" by killing the Seven Trumpeters. Killing "angels" representing the Seven Deadly Sins is neato. Trying to *halt God's wrath* by killing His trumpeters is CRINGE actually, but uh… you know, it's just a Japanese uh… use of Christian themes. The trumpeters are acksually trying to summon an absent God. In the second game you find out the sin angels were actually GOOD, because they helped humans–"Gluttony" gave food to the starving, "Sloth" gave people houses, etc. So, they weren't really representative of the sins at all. Idk if that was intentional. That seems to be a common misunderstanding some Japanese have with Christianity, a sort of belief that Christianity is on one end representing at best Order or at worst Slavery, and the opposing end is "freedom", while Christians believe(correctly) that true freedom comes from God, and all men are either slaves to Him or to sin. And this is just me *guessing* what's going on in the creator's head, I have no idea tbf. Meanwhile the Seven Trumpeters("Demons") seem to represent *maybe, idk yet* the Seven Virtues, with the first two bosses of the second game being Purity(Chastity?) and uh… Temperance, or "Tempelance", because Japanese. A typical kinda inversion of good and evil. It's never a mind-blowing concept, but "It's Okay When Japan Does It." It's a very JAPANESE thing to use Christian words and imagery and apply gloomy doomerism and/or humanism to it. But it's often not very *evil* so I can't be too offended by it. When I call it an "inversion of good and evil" here, it's really only in semantics. Again: The gluttony's not really gluttony it's "feeding the starving" and the "Purity" is more akin to total sterility: Unfruitfulness is necessarily not Christian. Am I coping a little because it's ultimately a Japanese pervert's guro-fetish game that's obviously aiming for a sort of "ackshually excessive carnal desire is good" angle? Of course I am, but I'm still RIGHT, because the only thing kinda excessive in the game is the gore, like there's no glorification of GIANT UGLY FAT GIRLS, or really *any* of the deadly sins. Except uh, probably lust. But EVERYTHING ELSE, I SUBMIT, IS MOSTLY INNOCENT. YES, I do subscribe to the "All Good Things Belong to God" of CS Lewis, INCLUDING something good that's "supposed to be" anti-religious. YES, it's "not fair"("NOOOOOOOOOOO YOU CAN'T CLAIM THIS AS YOUR OWN, IT'S AGAINST YOUUUUU!!!"). NO, I do not care that it's unfair. Besides, it's not like it's a frequent occurrence for something "anti-religious" to be good anyway LMAO. Lemme try to remember the last time something explicitly anti-religious(and I'm denying that this is) was good enough for me to try to cope-enjoy it… … …… ……… It was probably some JRPG, wasn't it? It surely was. Anyway, so The Citadel is ACKSHUALLY a CHRISTIAN game, an EXPLICITLY Christian game, objectively speaking. And so is its sequel, which I haven't finished and may never because I think I'm getting disemboweled waifu fatigue. "NOOOOOOOOO IT'S SUPPOSED TO B–" Since when does anyone care about what something's supposed to be? Yikes that sounds super restrictive, and restrictions are bad I am told constantly. 3… Beyond Citadel is rly good. It has a bunch of new npcs that help make its world feel much more alive. Just like its prequel, it’s really one of the best shooters I’ve ever played, and it’s made by 1 horny Japanese man and it just curbstomps the shit(shit) made by multi-million dollar teams of the finest diversity-hires money can buy spending years and years. 4… I'm in the last few stages of Beyond Citadel. I've had enough of anime girl intestines to last me a lifetime, but I do have to repeat that it is unquestionably one of the best FPS games I've ever played, and maybe one of the best period. Also most levels have collectible lewd art, and I'm not going to pretend that I don't like it. None of it's guro, don't worry, they're perfectly "innocent" pin-ups. I've heard the ending's a bummer. I don't really care, because the entire game's been a bummer. Vintage Japan. God willing I'll have the energy to make a review page for it, but it won't be too much beyond what I've said in the blog already. There will be more though, I'll be covering–because the game does–issues like ABORTION(murder) and INCEST WITH YOUR SHOTA BROTHER. I'll be taking care to avoid tainting my brilliant interpretations of the game by not exposing myself to any more dumb Reddit peabrain takes like "It's a commentary on religious extremism!🤓" It's not. The End… Lemme wrap up. All of this—or too much of this spawned from me skimming some discussions and seeing “religious extremism” being suggested as being the target of the game. Yeah, RELIGIOUS EXTREMISTS really love murdering babies in the womb, right? All those religious extremists you hear about in the news hunting down pregnant women and stabbing them in the tummies. Anyway. THE END? The end... The ending wasn’t so bad, idk what everyone’s complaining about. I guess the game itself prepared me for it, the seeming meaninglessness of the Martyr’s life. It’s really easy for me to find hope in it, but I can find hope in anything. Spoil it for you? Nah, just play it. It’s a great game. I’ll at least tell you that there’s no salvation without Christ at the end of the game 😏 And so it’s safe to say that The Citadel and Beyond Citadel are closer to an attack on Christian HERESY than Christianity.
So that’s it, I HIGHLY recommend The Citadel and Beyond Citadel for not just a unique FPS experience, but a superior one. The uniqueness would be enough on its own. When was the last time you played a shooter and incapacitated an enemy, and instead of finishing them off, you wish that they’d get up and kill you instead? There is something really wild to all of the enemies being cute girls—when you shoot those helmets off, hopefully not with their heads in them—it’s impossible to still see them as enemies anymore. I saw some meme like “What do you feel when you shoot them?” and someone just said “recoil”, I PITY that poor fuck, that’s missing so much of the experience. If you’re not miserable playing this game, you’re not having fun. Good games, 8/10 each, & they get a Christian Pass. Obviously all of this is COPE because lewd anime girls with guns are fun to look at, but I’m still completely correct and you can turn off the nudity (AND gore) anyway. |
Yes.