Melkor, Weakest of the Valar

Melkor, by Thomas Rouillard

It's a common misconception among casual LOTR fans that Melkor AKA Morgoth the Black Foe of the World was "the mightest of the Valar".

Melkor is a loser whose powers include Seething, Brooding, and Screaming. He's the only Valar to ever actually be scared of anything. That's a pretty big deal. If you're "stronger" than me, but I can literally make you flee from me screaming in terror, does it really matter? I don't think it does. Can you imagine being so scared of YOUR siblings that you flee the continent after upsetting them?

You don't have to imagine, because that's ~Just Melkor Things~

Let's take a look at some of Melkor's feats throughout the First Age:

>Being the first person to ever poorly perform music.

>Inventing Jealousy.

>Being unable to create anything new, unlike his siblings who created entire planets and even sentient races.

>Being beaten up by his younger brother and chained up.

>Stabbing some trees (trees cannot move or defend themselves)

>Being beaten up by a spider (a female spider LMAO)

>Screaming so loudly when he was caught by said spider that it echoed in the valley for centuries. Melkor may have been the first sentient being to ever scream at a spider.

>Being trapped inside his caves like a rat because he was too scared of the Maia in charge of pulling the Sun. (ANOTHER GIRL LMAO!)

>Being permanently crippled by an Elf and being humiliated so badly that his Orcs didn't even brag that the Elf died.

>Being put to sleep by another Elf like a complete idiot.

>Literally quivering in fear because an army of Elves were outside his gate, and only winning said battle because some Easterlings betrayed everyone.

>Having his feet cut off while he was running away from his siblings.

>Being cast into a void of darkness to brood until the End of the World.

Wow, Mightiest of the Valar 🖐😲🖐

M*rgoth was and will always be a failure, a loser, a coward, and a weakling. He was the first and worst of all of those things. He never did anything great on his own, ever. Imagine needing an army of Balrogs to save you from a spider. You don't have to imagine that, it's ~Just Melkor Things~. Thank you.